If only there was a door way to walk out of your feelings….life would have been an easy journey.
Feelings keep surfacing as long as you have a waking mind talking to you, bringing your thoughts alive and keep them playing for you. Thoughts lead to feelings and this goes on until the next turn happens. New thoughts…new feelings and life is one long journey of feelings; some good and some troubling, but they do not have to remain a constant.
Feelings they are fleeting…time tells us that. So, why do we imagine a world or a place in our lives where we are going to continue to be stifled with feelings of loss, betrayal, loneliness, anger, frustration, hurt, despair, hopelessness and many others? I would think so because, we tend to live in the present as we are always asked to and hence do not believe that with the passing of time, which is in the future, thoughts could change and thereby feelings too.
When faced with difficult situations it is our feelings that we are unable to deal with, they take over our lives and cripple us, many a time even stopping us from handling the situation right or going through our hardships with grit. We may also tend to struggle with knowing what is temporary in our lives and what is really permanent. This hinders our decision making on what we need to hold on to or let go of. Feelings come and go and it well could be under our control to know what we do with them. Hanging on to the difficult ones could spoil our good moments, relationships and opportunities.
So what do we do with them? We need to get aware of our maladaptive thoughts and limiting beliefs that cause difficult feelings in different situations. Feelings primarily have to be identified, acknowledged, shared with someone we trust and, dealt with appropriately. This would aid the release of difficult feelings in good time and help us move forward. We would also need to replace our limiting beliefs with more positive ones that we can relate to and stop ourselves from experiencing the ‘affect’. No feeling is final; they can change with the choice we make to deal with them.
Someone has quoted, “Feelings are much like waves, we can’t stop them from coming, but we can choose which one to surf’. When you find yourself overwhelmed by difficult feelings, do remember feelings come and go.
If you are finding it difficult to handle the feelings you are going through, please do reach out and share. We at LeanonMe are here to hear you!
AUTHOR: Portia, Lead Counsellor
Tried the LeanonMe COUNSELLING APP?
Download now, register and chat anonymously with professional counsellors from Monday through Friday (10 am to 6 pm). THE FIRST SESSION IS FREE! Google Play | App Store